November Family Law Support Team Notes

Hey,

Here are some random thoughts and notes about the Family Law Support Team as we head into another month.

It is interesting to point out that the divorce rate for people who have been remarried is higher than the rate for first marriages. In part this can be attributed to the fact that the fear of the unknown no longer exists in people who have 'been there and done that' so to speak. If you are about to become a first time divorcee or have been through the process before but want to do a better job, than I recommend coming to the Family Law Support Team's free seminar this month.

On the 25th of November my business - The Family Law Support Team - is holding another seminar, this time it is completely free. Showing up to one of these family law seminars is 'like getting punched in the face with a fist of knowledge' as I recently heard someone say.

If you can't make that then you can always book a free consultation with us. I read recently in the Metro that a lot of lawyers offer free consultations that end up entrapping potential clients and getting them hooked in. I can say with certainty that that kind of pressure does not exist in my business. The lawyers I use see many more people for free than those who end up retaining them. On top of that they are highly qualified and can demand from the market top dollar, so I am grateful they are giving back to the community through their involvement with the FLST.

When you come meet them, or hear them speak at our seminars, or work 1-on-1 in a workshop it will likely change your opinion of lawyers. The Canadian legal profession has taken a beating at times through books like lawyer's gone bad, which you can read an objective review of here: LAWYERS GONE BAD: MONEY, SEX AND MADNESS
IN CANADA’S LEGAL PROFESSION, by Philip
Slayton

Pets & Divorce

Man who got his wife's goat in bizarre divorce settlement

Oct 16th

You don't expect this to be happening still, but nonetheless...

Interracial couple denied marriage license in La.

October Thoughts

Well the cold weather is here and I've definitely noticed an increase in business and people contacting me with divorce related questions. This got me thinking if higher divorce rates would correlate geographically with cold weather/less sun.

Well according to William R. Maddox Jr., from Marriage Savers, in the US of A at least, "Strangely enough, the divorce rate of any place in the continental United States can be reliably predicted by knowing the number of days out of the year that women there can wear swimsuits. Generally, the more warm weather days suitable for bathing attire, the higher the divorce rate; the more cold weather days unsuitable for swimwear, the lower the divorce rate."

US Divorce Rates and Geography

Catch 22

If you saw yesterday's Toronto Star you may have caught the curious case of Larissa Chism and Tara Ranzy, a lesbian couple from Indiana who married in Ontario. Their predicament is that they now wish to divorce and Ontario law stipulates that one spouse must reside in the Province for at least one year in order to have divorce granted. Of course Indiana does not legally allow or recognize gay marriage. Put it all together and you get some silliness.


Here is the article:

http://www.thestar.com/article/699523

Family Psychology

http://www.academicearth.org/lectures/intro-families-and-couples

Psychology of couples/families.

September Seminars and Thoughts

I've been away traveling in and around upstate New York for large parts of August so I missed posting an August blog and now its September! The Family Law Support Team at www.divorce-advice-ontario.com is going through a busy period. On Sept 16th and 24th we're running our 8th and 9th Seminars of the year. Since we launched in December of 2008 our seminars have been my favorite aspect of this venture, not just because I am always challenged and excited by the people I meet and the stories they tell, but also because these seminars have been the starting point for many long term relationships with people we've helped get clarity on their complex family law proceedings. To be honest I also enjoy the challenge of public speaking.

I've been thinking a lot recently about relationships, as I think everyone does, and how they relate to what I'm doing through work. There's definitely another level to divorce that the legal system and lawyers are usually incapable of addressing and that's the emotional toll that these situations take on people and the need to resolve that spectrum of divorce. I think it's important to allow yourself to grieve if you have been hurt by the loss "failure" of a marriage. In my opinion the best way to do that is to settle your differences with your ex quickly and outside of the court system. Too many people drag things out in court to get "back" at the other party but this only prevents them from moving on with their lives quicker and makes lawyers richer. That is why we always suggest settling to our clients. Try to look beyond the emotional issues so you can get the logistics completed, then you will have a blank slate to work on your personal issues.

Once you have the legal ties between you cut with a divorce order and you have agreed to your future association/disassociation through asset division, support, custody schedule, child support and so on, you can then go to work on the hard part of managing your psychology and personal life as a divorcee.

I'll write more about the concept of "failure" and how it applies to marriage and relationships (doesn't really exist at all) soon.

Warm Regards,

JL